Dear Joe,
 
I wrote not because I want to embarrass myself from your readers, but because I wanted to have the peace of mind that I’ve always wanted. That “letting this all out” might just help me.

After eleven years of being apart from Tim, I finally had a chance to see him again. You see, he was a childhood friend. The night I saw him again was very meaningful because it started a beautiful relationship with him. As I tell my friends, that night was so magical that I even forgot that I had a boyfriend. And to top it all, my parents didn’t even know that.

I was so afraid that if they find out, they would get so mad at me. But what could I do? I’m just seventeen and so confused.

Even if I already had a boyfriend, I started seeing Patrick. I ended up choosing him instead of the other one. Our relationship was fine. When suddenly, he grew colder and colder. Maybe I ignored that and so it led to “I need some time and I need to be apart from you”.

My world crashed and I didn’t know what to do. I thought that if I let him go, he’d come back eventually and say that it was a big mistake of letting me go. I was hurt, Joe, so hurt that even my friends think I’m crazy when I laugh hard in front of them. Deep inside, I’m dying. Slowly fading and hoping he’d be back.

He calls whenever he thinks of me, and that adds more to the confusion because when I say I’m ready to let go, he shakes my world again. We talk as if there’s nothing wrong and that hurts. This pain grows stronger as the day passes and I don’t know how to really heal this. I know that time will lessen the pain but I’m tired. So tired of waiting and being afraid that my dreams of being with him won’t come true.

I know this is stupid but that’s how I feel. And, Joe, I have my pride to protect and I can’t go on begging for him to love me again because I’ve done enough to make him change his mind.

I know I’m still young and guys will come and go. I just can’t seem to get over this. Until now, I’m still hoping that he will be back but chances are getting slim to zero. And maybe, he has someone right now. And I hope he is happy right now. I may not be the one who will take care of him but I hope, that he’d be good. I just wan’t him that way.

Thank you for your time and I hope this reaches him. I still love him so much but I have to set aside my feelings so that this won’t hurt anymore.

Janel

Dear Janel,

The best part of being in love with someone is in being convinced that that person would be with us forever. Most of us start our relationships believing in the promise of love without end. Unfortunately, not all relationships end the way we want them to.

To some, love comes in a fleeting moment and goes away just as fast. But the problem is, getting over the feeling always seems to take a lifetime. Because the only person who can heal us from the pain that we feel is usually the very same person who hurt us and made us cry. Sometimes, just as we are about to accept the failure of our relationship, that person comes back to us and unknowingly destroys our defenses.

Suddenly, we find ourselves hooked to love again. And it hurts even more because we know that person doesn’t share the same feeling anymore. Even if there is the urge to forget because it hurts there would always be that compelling reason to hope for love to come back again. It is like waiting for the sun to shine in the middle of a storm.

Janel, the love that brings us pain should be  the same love that would heal our hearts. When you love so much that it begins to hurt  then you have to learn to let go to lessen your  pain. Love hurts and sometimes it hurts like there is no tomorrow anymore. But there still is and there would always be one. No matter how battered and stricken we have been, there would always be tomorrow that would bring hope and love. But that tomorrow would never come unless we leave the past behind and live today as we should.

Let the pain remain for a while and let the tears fall as they please. And after all  that, move on and find your place in this world where you will find the person who wouldn’t talk to you as if nothing is wrong but  the person who would talk to you and make you feel that everything is going to be all right.