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Dear Joe,
I wrote to you because I have no one to turn to.
Jay and I have been very close friends ever since we met in college. We would do everything together. He was a shoulder to cry on.
Joe, we’re both in relationships and we’d always talk about them whenever we went out. Even our special someone’s allow the two of us to go out together because they know Jay and I are best friends.
Three years after graduation, we bumped into each other at our common friend’s wedding. Jay was with Diane, and I was with Robert. Joe, I didn’t know that it would be the most unforgettable wedding that I would ever attend. When the sock and bouquet of flower were thrown, Jay and I got it, respectively. He was asked to put the sock in my feet while our college friends were teasing us and I was surprised to see Jay blushing. Our friends requested for a kiss, and it wasn’t a hard task, not even our partners would oppose. But before he kissed me, he uttered the words “I love you” to me.
I felt different afterwards. I felt something I haven’t felt for the longest time we’ve been friends. Joe, we would go out without Diane and Robert’s knowledge. I asked Jay, “bakit ngayon pa?”. Sooner than I thought, our hidden relationship came out in the open.
Robert understood and figured that Jay might have something he doesn’t, and would never have but Robert followed his previous line, saying that he can’t imagine life without me.
Jay had already broken up with Diane, to make way for our relationship. Joe, I know that whatever I decide to do, it wouldn’t make everyone happy. I tried to end it with Robert, but he wouldn’t let go.
I believe that Jay and I have the strongest foundation any couple could have, and that is friendship. I never imagined that Jay and I would be more than friends. Joe, if Robert really loves me, he has to set me free. I know he deserves someone better than me, someone who can love him more.
But just like any other love story, all good things are not meant to last. On our first anniversary, Jay and I got into a car accident, When I regained consciousness I saw Jay’s hand holding mine, his head and shirt was full of blood, but he was still able to say “I love you” before he took his last breath.
Robert would often visit me in the hospital. He would tell me he loves me. But, my feelings for him has changed. Joe, I am not yet ready to give anyone a chance to have a place in my heart but Robert is so insistent.
I haven’t seen or heard from him since I turned down his proposal to give our relationship a second chance. I’d like to say sorry for all the things I did to hurt him. I would also like to thank him for setting me free. Just like some pigeons, not all can go back to their master’s home. Some find a better place, some find a better partner and some just die lonely. Joe, in this relationship, no one went home happy, all of us became losers to the love we thought we will have forever.
Truly Yours,
Charissa
THANK you Charissa for sharing a bitter part of your past with us. Sometimes, we ask ourselves why love leaves us at times when we have given so much of ourselves that there is only little left for us to start all over with. A lot of us have built dreams with people we hoped would be with us forever only to wake up to reality that there is nothing permanent in this world. Love comes and goes. People share their lives with us and then they leave us. Life is a constant cycle of finding and losing, of making and breaking, of dying and living again.
Charissa, when our hearts die, it stops beating but love doesn’t share the same fate. I don’t believe that love ends permanently in eternity. When we feel that love has died, it hasn’t and it will not. It will only close its eyes into a deep slumber that will one day, be awakened by someone who holds another key to our hearts.
Robert may not have that key and it was just fair when you made it clear that there is nothing more that he can expect from you. When love hurts us we shut our doors close and live in a dark and lonely world where we think we would be safe. Charissa, you cannot stay in that world forever. One day, you would have to open a window to see if the storm is over. Otherwise, you wouldn’t know when to get up and live your life again.
Let us always remember that in life, there are no mistakes, only lessons learned. In loving, there should be no regrets, only appreciation for the joy it brought us. There is a time when life stops when love ends. But, we don’t have to stay in one place forever. Our lives should move on even when everything else around us makes us feel that it shouldn’t. For there can only be happiness when we stop living in the past. Love will only find its way back when we start giving others the chance to share a little of themselves with us. We may be miserable now, but there will always be someone out there who holds another key that will unlock the pain and bitterness in our hearts that keep us from taking the chance to love again.
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No one went home happy
Friday, 13 January 2012
Dear Joe, I wrote to you because I have no one to turn to. Jay and I have been very close friends ever since we met in college. We would do...
Friday, 13 January 2012
Dear Joe, I wrote to you because I have no one to turn to. Jay and I have been very close friends ever since we met in college. We would do...
